Last Thursday, I was called into the "conference room" which is really just a giant table in the middle of the showroom. HR lady said, "last night I got a call at home from someone in the office who expressed concern at your appearance.". I wanted to say, "Where else would you get a call given you don't have an office??????". Instead, I sighed inside knowing that this was yet another ploy in my boss' calculated and manipulative plan to push me out of there under "Justifiable reasons" so he can get out of paying unemployment.
She asked about my seizure disorder and my meds. My boss said that people were commenting on my demeanor. I walked hunched over. I told him that it was because I pulled a muscle in my neck in my sleep while I had a seizure. It was mild. While I actually wasn't sure if I had a seizure, I suspect I might have had a mild one because when I got out of bed, I was in a brain fog. Even though I hadn't drank the night before, I felt hungover and my neck really hurt but I could still move and I wanted to go to work because I'm saving the days when I call in sick for days that I'm interviewing. Sleazy bossman said I was dopey. That's because I got 3 hours of sleep, I told him.
He was dramatizing everything. I was tired, yes but I still got dressed up, took a shower and put makeup on. Even a coworker (the new one and the only ally I have there) said that I looked tired but not dramatically and certainly not as bad as my boss was making it sound.
The HR "consultant" went on about how "worried" she was. I so wanted to roll my eyes. Maybe I should go on leave, she commented. I told her no. I could work. I was fine. She snapped that by law she could require me to provide a letter from my doctor stating I was okay to work on those medications. I told her I was going to see another doctor on Thursday. Not true. I'm interviewing for one of the jobs that was on hold for over a month. This is a good one and I really hope to get it. More on that later....
She wanted me to call the other doctor "today" to ask if those medications were compatible. Even if the appointment was legitimate, I still wouldn't call a doctor who I've never met to ask him something like that over the phone. Is she that much of a moron? That's not how it works.
So, for shits and giggles, I went ahead and got a note from the doctor I had been seeing at the local clinic. Sure the doctor is young, inexperienced, but she's and MD nonetheless and the one who has been subscribing me those meds. The letter stated what medication I was on and that I was okay to work. Guess HR consultant had nothing else to threaten me with. There are laws. The 1970 Disability Act. I wanted to tell her that but I didn't.
So today, when HR called me in yet AGAIN, I whipped out the note. My boss then talked about my demeanor the other day and how dopey I looked. He then said that some other news was brought to his attention that was "troubling". I sighed inside yet again. Someone had filed a complaint against me for saying something that constituted harassment.
I will try not give away too much because that would reveal the source of my employment which has never been my intention. On many big ticket items that we sell, the manufacturer sets a price that you cannot sell below. Occasionally, we look for dealers breaking that policy. I was showing this new girl how to do this.
I explained my marketing strategy to her: We sell luxury merchandise and what we have going for us is that we live in a very notorious, touristy, affluent region of the country whereas our biggest competitor lives in the "white trash" region of the country. That was the complaint that merited an investigation. Apparently, many people came forward and said they were "offended". The witch hunt is on yet again!
Nevermind that a fellow employee constantly makes fun of the southerners who call. He referred to my boss as a "cheap jew" and made fun of a caller w/ an Asian dialect (when we had a Vietnamese kid working there, no less). That's acceptable... but my remark against a COMPETITOR was not. It was harassment.
No. Harassment would be calling this girl a whore or a terrorist (she's middle eastern). Incidentally, this girl is part of the incestuous circle of that place. Pretentious goth chic has a brother who works there who has a girlfriend who works there and the terrorist whore is the girlfriend's BFF. She just joined the hate party....
So, that was pretty much it for me. When HR "consultant" talked about their harassment policy. I asked her what her policy was for stashing marijuana in a coworkers drawer. I'm tired of keeping my mouth shut. Time to spill the beans. My boss looked shocked. Then he denied it. He claimed he never opened the bag and didn't know what was in it. I said, "yes you did" and I told him that I had recorded the conversation. Then I repeated the conversation verbatim. He shut up. So now there is going to be an investigation regarding the pot that was stashed in my drawer. I get to meet with "HR consultant" tomorrow.
You play nice. I play nice. You play dirty. Well, so do I....
My boss told me that he was bound by law to write me up for the "racist" comment I made. HR consultant had to be there. Ironic that as soon as she left, he pulled me in the other room to ask me what I was doing recording the conversation about the pot. I told him that I was covering my own ass because an illegal drug was planted in my drawer and I was afraid a coworker had planted it there. He told me he threw it out. What a liar.
I wouldn't be surprised if my boss was behind it. He's so full of shit and he doesn't realize that I can see right through him. The pot either ended up in the drawer because a) it was someone's intention to frame me and I found it before they could; or b) it was meant for the guy who used to occupy that desk but who had switched workstations when my boss decided that I needed to be within his line of vision.
That said, I have this interview Thursday afternoon. I actually have 3 interviews this week. One phone interview on Wednesday. My in person interview with that job i really want on Thursday. It's w/ that international company. I did a ton of research on their company over the weekend. I was going to work Thursday morning and then go to the interview but after today, I've decided to take the day off. I want to make sure I arrive at the interview fresh and untainted by the toxicity of the office. Then I have another phone interview that afternoon.
I sent out resumes for some virtual positions which would enable me to work flexible hours from home while I look for something more permanent. You see, I really want to quit my current job. Money is the only reason I subject to myself to that horrible, horrible place. I would take a dramatic pay cut and be stuck living on beans and rice. I'd have to cancel my wine club memberships, DISH and pay the bare minimum on my credit cards which I'm trying to pay off.
The new girl who worked there can't believe the way I'm treated. And when I told her what happened today, she couldn't believe that i was written up for it. She was there when I made that remark. It was totally not racist. But I couldn't ask her to step forward in my defense. She's young, needs the job and I'm on my way out whereas she will probably stay and needs to get along w/ her coworkers.
As for the meditation? I still do it. In the morning. In the evening. This week it's been Brain Sync's "create success" and I've continued the "Universal Mind Meditation". I'm trying really hard not to lose hope and faith... after all, my spiritual journey was the purpose of this blog but it is slowly transforming into an "I hate my job" blog.
Hating your job really makes life difficult. I don't hate my life. I have a great home in a great location. I like myself even if my coworkers hate me. I've had a pretty interesting life. My neighbors rock and my cat... well, she's the greatest.
So what if my parents are dead and my siblings don't care if I'm dead or alive. So what if my dream to have a career as an actor failed. So what if I'm in debt up to my eyeballs. I have friends all over the country and a great nephew who loves me.
But the job thing... when you hate your job, it creeps into your life. It makes it hard to sleep and when you do sleep, you dream about people you hate and places you hate. Weekends are great until Sunday afternoon. Then the feeling of dread sets in. And lately, that feeling of dread starts creeping in on Saturday.
The day that I get to quit my job will be the greatest day of my life. I'm just afraid that I will never have the chance to quit because my boss will win in his effort to fire me with his bogus HR sessions.
In any case, my boss is shitting a brick about the recording I have of him acknowledging the pot that was in my drawer. He asked me if I had recorded other things. I said no.
I lied.
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