While I am really trying to stay away from all of the above, it's unrealistic that I will cut all these things out of my diet permanently. There is no holistic remedy (that I'm aware of) for headaches and the one I had last night was pretty debilitating.
My job interview is scheduled for Wednesday at 2. I'm really looking forward to it. Unlike LA, entertainment entities in the Bay area are not a dime a dozen so the fact that I'm under consideration for one of the few makes me ecstatic. I do feel pretty good about it. In fact, this is the most optimistic I've been about any job in a very long time.
When I started this blog, it was because I was frustrated with my job situation and was attempting to tap into my higher power. I had deleted my "I hate my job and you would too if you were me" blog because I felt it was too negative and my intent was to be more optimistic about life, regardless of circumstance. Clearly I have mastered the job of being a negative Nelly because this blog eventually ended up with much the same tone as the "I hate my job and you would too if you were me" blog.
When I started this blog, I was looking frantically for another job because I was afraid I was going to get fired and my employer was going to attempt to screw me out of unemployment. Never have I felt so under fire by a group of people. Back then, I was listening to the Universal Mind Meditation nightly while I fell asleep which went on for at least two months. There was a position with a Swiss watch company that I was obsessed with getting mainly because a) it wasn't my current job; b) it was not in wine country; c) it was very different from my current job; d) I would get to travel; e) it was not my current job; f) it was not my current job; g) it was not my current job....
As fate would have it: I was laid off with severance and no resistance in getting unemployment, I didn't get the Swiss watch company job and I have spent the last 3+ licking my wounds while doing some self-exploration. I am convinced that the only reason I got a severance and my former boss was so nice about letting me go was because I had evidence of the drug activity that went on in the office. These frequent HR meetings reprimanding me for ridiculous reasons were becoming tiresome.
The last straw was when I was accused of being racist because I used the term "white trash region" to describe the Louisiana/Mississippi area of the country. It was defined as "harassment" and I was forced to sign all this documentation informing me of "policy". I remember thinking, "If these bitches want a fight, then a fight is what I will give them." I then asked my recruiter, while my boss was present: "What's the policy about illegal drugs in the workplace?" I brought up the pot that was left in my desk a couple of months earlier and how I had given it to my boss. (I believe it was meant for the asshole who had the desk before me). My boss attempted to deny it to which I responded with letting him know that I had recorded it all on my iphone. I then recited our conversation verbatim. My boss looked like a deer in the headlights. He, who had previously insisted it was absolutely necessary that his HR consultant is present during all meetings with me, didn't waste any time pulling me off to the side as soon as she left the room to ask me what else I had recorded. I filed an official complain regarding the pot in my desk. The HR "talks" subsided and two weeks later I was laid off with severance, unemployment documentation and I even got a hug!
Let's ponder the course of the last few months and reveal possible scenarios that could have unraveled had circumstances gone a different course.
If didn't get laid off, I could still be at the place that shall not be named hating my job and life or, perhaps working somewhere else that was also not a good fit for me. While I was job hunting before I got laid off, there was a sense of urgency that was present. I applied for just about any job that I felt remotely qualified for and that I was pretty sure would pay me what I was looking to get paid (which was what I should have been getting paid by my cheap boss). After getting laid off, that sense of urgency dissipated. Since I was on unemployment I felt that I could be more selective as to where I applied.
Also, after getting laid off, I realized I didn't want to work for the Swiss watch company. The offices were not much cleaner than the place that shall not be named and the owner? Well, lets just say that I saw some similarities between he and the owner of the place that shall not be named. When I didn't get the job, I was slightly relieved. My neighbor told me that she didn't think it was a good fit for me anyway and I wholeheartedly agree. The job I am interviewing for Wednesday is, without a doubt, a perfect fit for me.
Had I not gotten laid off or gotten the job with the SWC, I would have never been able to fast for 30 days and never had been inspired to change my diet and cut out caffeine and alcohol routines. I would have never had the realization that I still want to act and I would have never taken the voiceover class. These are things I'm still interested in doing but I need a stream of income first. A friend of mine has volunteered to do headshots so it will not cost me anything. I would not have discovered this had I not been laid off or gotten the job with the SWC. The last three months also gave me a mental health vacation which is something I so desperately needed.
If I do get this job, I have decided not to move to San Francisco but move to South Marin County. Marin county is on the North side of the Golden Gate Bridge. In fact, the county line is on the Golden Gate Bridge. Marin is also quite expensive but it's a tad bit cheaper than SF because you will get more for your money there. I would not have to get rid of my car if I move to Marin and I don't want to sell it as it's one of the few things of value that I own.
Marin isn't culture shock. It's the best of both worlds. There are very rural parts of Marin but it's mostly suburban. You have Mount Tamalpais on one said and San Francisco on the other. In Marin, I could take the bus into the city or if I live in Sausalito, I could even walk or ride my bike over the Golden Gate. Back in my NYC days, I used to ride my bike over the Queensboro bridge and into the city. By the time I made my final descent down the bridge hill, I was in the midst of a full-fledged endorphin rush. There is nothing like riding into the Manhattan skyline while endorphins are flowing freely. Those were definitely the days.
Magic is quite happy in wine country so moving will be hard for her. She likes to sit on her perch and admire the birds and country life outside her window. Cats are very sensitive and moving into a more congested city would be a bit much for her. I spent much of my weekend looking online for rentals in south Marin. While I am nowhere near ready to move, I do want to educate myself as much as possible. If I get this job, then I am looking to move at the end of the year. Supposedly, Winter is the best time to look for an apartment. I read this online and my neighbor, who's a property manager, concurred.
This morning when I checked my email, I had received a job notification from a recruiter in the UK regarding a marketing position she was filling in London. My heart jumped. Immediately I emailed her back to let her know I was in the US and to inquire whether she was accepting applicants in the US or if this was just an oversight. She responded to let me know that they weren't considering US applicants but that she would let me know if they ever were. Perhaps it would be my fate to move to Europe one day?
Wherever my career path takes me is currently unknown but I'm confident that it will be a lot more pleasant than the previous stop.
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