The Black Sheep

After a funeral someone said to me -
You know I only see you at funerals
it's been 3 since June -
been 5 since June for me -
He said I've made a vow -
I only go to death parties if I know someone before
they were sick -
Why?
cause - cause - cause I feel I feel so
sad cause I never knew their life -
and now I only know their death
And because we are members of the
Black Sheep family -

We are sheep with no shepherd -
We are sheep with no straight and narrow
We are sheep with no meadow
We are sheep who take the dangerous
pathway thru the mountain range
to get to the other side of our soul.
We are the black sheep of the family
called Black Sheep folk.
We always speak our mind.
appreciate differences in culture
believe in sexual preferences
believe in no racism no sexism no religionism
and we'll fight for what we believe
but usually we're pagans,
There's always one in every family
Even when we're surrounded by bodies
we're always alone -
You're born alone
and you die alone
written by a black sheep.
You can't take it with you -
written by a former black sheep.
Black Sheep folk look different from their family -
The way they look at the world
We're a quirk of nature -
We're a quirk of fate -
Usually our family, our city, our country
never understands us -
We knew this from when we were very young
that we were not meant to be understood.
That's right. That's our job.
Usually we're not appreciated
until the next generation.
That's our life. That's our story.
Usually we're outcasts, outsiders
in our own family.
Don't worry - get used to it.
My sister says I don't understand you !
But I have hundreds of sisters with me tonight.
My brother says I don't want you !
But I have hundreds of brothers with me here tonight !
My mother says I don't know how to love someone like you !
You're so different from the rest !
But I have hundreds of mamas with me here tonight !
My father says I don't know how to hold you !
But I have hundreds of daddies with me here tonight !

We're related to people we love who can't say -
I love you Black Sheep daughter
I love you Black Sheep son -
I love you outcast, I love you outsider
But tonight we love each other -
That's why we're here -
to be around others like ourselves -
So it doesn't hurt quite so much -
In our world, our temple of difference -
I am at my loneliest when I have
something to celebrate and try
to share it with those I love but
who don't love me back.
There's always silence at the end
of the phone -
There's always silence at the end
of the phone -

Sister - Congratulate me !
NO I CAN'T YOU'RE TOO LOUD -
GRANDMA LOVE ME
NO I DON'T KNOW HOW TO LOVE
SOMEONE LIKE YOU
Sometimes the Black Sheep is a soothsayer,
a psychic, a magician of sorts -
Black Sheep see the invisible
We know each others thoughts
We feel fear and hatred

Sometimes, some sheep are chosen to be sick
to finally have average, flat, boring
people say I love you.
Sometimes, Black Sheep are chosen to be sick
so families can finally come together
and say I love you.
Sometimes, some Black Sheep are chosen to die
so loved ones, families, countries
and cultures
can finally say
Your life was worth living !
Your life meant something to me !
I loved you all along !

Black Sheep's destinies are not in
necessarily having families,
having prescribed existences -
like the American Dream.
Black Sheep destinies are to give
meaning in life - to be angels,
to be conscience, to be nightmares
to be actors in dreams.

Black Sheep can be family to strangers
We can love each other like MOTHER
FATHER SISTER BROTHER CHILD
We understand universal love
We understand unconditional love.
We feel a unique responsibility
a human responsibility for feelings for others
We can be all things to all people -
We are there at 3.30AM when you call
We are here tonight cause I just can't
go to sleep. I have nowhere else to go -
I'm a creature of the night -
I travel in your dreams
I feel your nightmares
We are your holding hand -
We are your pillow, your receiver,
your cuddly toy.
I feel your pain.
I wish I could relieve you of your suffering.
I wish I could relieve you of your pain.
I wish I could relieve you of your death.
Silence at the end of the phone.
Silence at the end of the phone.
Silence at the end of the phone.

 - Karen Finley